Impending Doom

What a day!

Today I was supposed to go to work an hour early (8am) but woke up late (forgetting to keep the alarm). Luckily for me, my biological clock woke me before it was too late. Then I had to get to work in a taxi at super-traffic hour. I jumped on the taxi driver since he refused to go on the road I suggested (but to my surprise his route seemed a much better option today). Of course, I didn't tell him that or my breakfast-deprived, morning tea-deprived tantrum would have been in vain.

At work, I lay low, as I had worn mismatched clothes and accessories. I didn't want to walk about. So I did my work quietly and anti-socially. At lunch though, the day brightened with a prospective travel buddy for my dream adventures later this year. I have not met the Boss in weeks, it gets harder to gather the nerves as days go by. I wonder which complex that is.

I thought I would have a preliminary driving test today, but the He-like Madam Examiner cut me off rudely and told me that she had no time to discuss my test timings. So I will have it later this week, still unprepared and without guts. If I fail, I have to spend a small fortune. Speaking of fortunes, I have more to spill...read on...

So after class (with a near-hit on another vehicle and confusing left/right as always), I went grocery shopping with the Sister and junior. After walking round and round shopping, with shoes that cut, trousers that kept slipping and an empty stomach, we returned home... to remember we had forgotten two bags back at the store. I was so looking forward to a relaxed few hours before bedtime.

But before that, after paying all my dues with my monthly wage received a few days back, I was utterly shocked to find out (from the ATM) that I was on the verge of bankruptcy with only a few bucks left to live on for three more weeks. My birthday present to myself by bringing my parents overseas for a visit, kinda backfired on me *sigh*. I need to learn more money management skills. Money will never be enough because universal laws suggest that expenses will always be directly proportional to one's income.

So back to forgotten bags... after gulping down a quick dinner, we drove back to the shopping centre with junior in his pajamas and collected the bags... and got back to remember we had also left a newly purchased broom next to an exit. What the hell! That's tomorrow's worry.

Today finally deserves a break.

Layers of time

I am still picking up the pieces which belong to me. The last few, I hope.

Clearly, the roads are not tolerant of new and to-be drivers. They just love to toot their horns behind them, forgetting they were once learners too.

Over-enthusiastic news bearers (aka Gossipers) never cease to surprise me. The extent of their networks, records and observational skills are stunning. Their only weakness seems to be that they can't keep their discoveries to themselves.

Kids say the darnest things!

Cursed are they who steal

Living with my new netbook is like living with a mentally handicapped child. Its functions are frustratingly limited and I am forced to love it and live with it with patience, knowing that I can't abandon it now. It may sound rudely insensitive, but the truth is, in reality, having a child with special needs can take a toll on the caregiver and is not always an easy ride one can take, even with all the love and faith.

I just finished reading The Hobbit. It was one of The most colourful and stimulating books I have ever read. One can only wonder in awe how such a timeless classic came to light. I look forward to LoTR.

A new and eventful week starts tomorrow; a driving test on roundabouts and U-turns, both of which I have not mastered yet and a karaoke night organised by the office, for which I intend to be part of the audience! OH and it's almost JUNE!!

I found a nice song by Boyzone released quite recently (during the short time they reunited after many years) called "Gave it All Away". It has a good feel to it, with the piano and chellos playing in the background. Popular music these days tend to be faster in pace and loud with strong lyrics and less instrumentals. And such music rarely speaks to the soul.

Fireflies

Each day, when I wake up, the world looks a different colour than the day before. The same problem seems different. The same person seems different. The same food tastes different. The same me seems different.

Radio stations play the most awful music at night time. It doesn't help to have the autoscan feature, since most of the stations have stopped playing or it could simply be that my room does not catch radiowaves.

Two interesting poems I read today made me realise that I need a break. A break from work, family and home. I have become so self-absorbed that I can no longer think objectively. I miss certain sides of myself as new sides become more dominant. Change is good but once the dust settles, it is about getting used to a whole new reality. There really is no comfort to be found anywhere outside of yourself.

Prince of Persia was one awesome movie! Loved the stunts..

Anything to look forward to? Not really.

'cos I'm a gypsy

The weekend is finally here! Feels good. Music, book, outings, friends and hopefully a new arrival.. (air conditioning is a real mood booster, don't u think?!)

This season being one of the most predictable American Idol finals... two equally deserving and talented contestants.. (Go Lee!)

A disappointing T20 final for me. Can't get over it yet. But hey, everyone is equally deserving of a win.

Movies.. backup plan was great, what's next?

Getting creative this week, with making lanterns. Faraway from home, culture and traditions, I want to *try* to keep some of them going as a tribute to my beginnings and for the legacy I leave behind.

I stare at you, The Violin Box on my cupboard. Opening you would send me down a heart-felt road of emotions, that would end in disappointment. But I long to have you back in my life, for all the happiness, peace and strength you gave me in the past.

Family ties are complex and requires sacrifice and bigger thinking. But blood does run thicker than water, as they say.

Sometimes it is really the freely available things that make one feel good; like VHF waves, fresh air, sunsets, blue water, green grass...

Day 2 - You can't have it all

I am back for the second successful day of blogging (Yay!), after a long day of work (where even toilet breaks were a luxury) and a day that goes down in MY history as the day that "Hiroshima" got bombed.

A clarification on my previous post. As it was rightly pointed out by a keen observer, I have been in fact living on 3 different regions of the same continent, and not 2. And all this time I thought I crossed over to a new continent. Oh well... reality can make you live in all kinds of bubbles.

As this eventful day draws to an end, I have made several important resolutions, that will ensure my survival and sanity:

1. I shall make the effort to step put of my head and step on the concrete floors of the house I live in.

2. I shall *try* to not be affected by biological components flowing in my bloodstream AND be accountable for all my actions concerning ME, primarily. Then, secondarily, for all things concerning others.

3. I shall not take for granted the good things that surround me.

4. I shall fight myself to be just, reasonable, compassionate, radical and right.

And with that, I retire for the night to be lost in the enchanted woods with Bilbo and the dwarves in The Hobbit, while also feeling truly grateful to the people who love and empower me...

Attempt No. 3

Here I am again for the third time, trying to start and keep a blog going. The challenge lies not in opening a blog, but in maintaining one. The first time I tried years back, it felt stupid to ramble on about myself to no-one (still does, but now I care a bit less). The second time, I was too anonymous I barely recognised myself (and I forgot my sign in details. Too anonymous, remember?). And now attempt no. 3. Why am I not giving up on this idea? 1) I think I have a GREAT voice inside my head, dying to shout out of my seemingly outer dull self. 2) I intend to write an autobiography before I die (and if I can't get this going, I will have to think of hiring someone to write FOR me!) and 3) There is this ''blog-for-a-blog'' deal I made and I intend to honour my end of the deal.

A few things about me. I am about a quarter of a century old. Yet, I don't seem to have my multiple personalities synchronised with my physical age. I have lived in two different continents and I am liking the current one a whole lot better than the last location. I never felt like I fitted in anywhere as a person (does anyone, really?). I am good at a lot of things, but I am an expert at none. Contrary to popular belief, I like change. I will even go to the ends of the earth for change. The biggest road block between me and Greatness is myself. I love to see the world with rosy-tinted glasses. Seriously, there is no point in dwelling in the inconveniences and misfortunes and the what-ifs and the what-nots. There is only one way that time flows in this universe and that is forwards. Today I am one person, and tomorrow any entirely different and an equally confused person. Enough said for today. Let's see if I can keep this blog rolling.