Recent advances in technology which make our lives so much connected and convenient must be commended. I am now able to read Sherlock Holmes through a phone application which I downloaded from http://www.gutenberg.com/. Until now, I had missed many opportunities to read that particular book. I didn't even have to go to a library or carry a book with me everywhere I go. Whenever I have some free time, be it waiting for someone, waiting in a queue, in need of a distraction from routine or simply waiting to fall asleep in bed, I can simply turn on the application, go to a bookmarked page and continue reading it. Amazing!
My thoughts on the book so far... Surely, Holmes is the star character, without whose advanced observational and deducing skills, we won't have any adventures to read about. But he is far from being a normal human bieng and had I known him in real life, I doubt he would have made a good friend. Watson, on the other hand, I find is a more relatable character. His feelings are honestly and more frequently expressed in the story. Their relationship however puzzles me. Watson, even with his poor investigative skills (in comparison with Holmes) and minimal contributions to solving mysteries, is very loyal to Holmes. Holmes, when he can surely use any trained person or a trusted police officer to be his side kick, prefers Watson instead. Let's assume Watson gets some glory in getting a juicy story to write about from an insider's point of view and perhaps also partial credit in solving a mystery, what does Holmes get from Watson? Someone who can put up with his strange ways and emotionally unresponsive personality? Or is it someone who obliges to any request Holmes makes? Let see, if I can understand this better as I read on. I'm still on Chapter 6 out of a possible 30.
Having spent 2 troubled weeks, this is analysis week. I've had experiences dealing with 4 different (difficult) people, who got to see a very reactive side of me, I usually don't summon.
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Case 1
A close friend from work, to whom I lent some money at her hour of need many months back and some of my sister's DVDs 6 months back. Time went by, she never attempted to return the DVDs even with a few reminders and she never spoke about the money even after the "agreed date for returning" passed by. I was feeling bad whenever my sister asked about the DVDs and things got tight after my unfortunate incident of losing a big cash bill recently.
Action: I sent her a very strong, no sugar glaze, message on Facebook instead of telling her directly at work. I did this because I am better at expressing myself in writing than speaking.
Response: She was very apologetic and confessed she "forgot about it" due to her carelessness and said she would return it this week at work.
Lesson: Be short and sharp in expressing what I need, whichever way I am comfortable doing it. Doesn't matter what people think of me, if I am reasonable.
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Case 2
A government official who has been neglecting processing an application I sent 14 months ago, despite numerous emails and calls.
Action: A very vocal and good friend of mine initiated a phone call to him, and I followed up with a strong email and copied some extra email addresses in hopes that someone senior might question this incompetent officer.
Response: Instant feedback from him and positive signs of him processing my application.
Lesson: ALWAYS include more recipients in an email, in addition to the person it is addressed to, preferably a senior authority, in emails that require action and transparency in dealings.
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Case 3
A blouse given to a tailor for stitching.
Action: He didn't deliver on the promised date. I was made to go an extra trip to collect this item to find out he hadn't even started on it. I went ballistic and made alot of noise at the shop. He promised to complete it the next day, after I lied about wanting to wear it the next day and expressed my disgust at their service. The only reason I pushed him was because I wanted to get my hands on this suit as early as possible as I was very excited to have it back.
Response: He did return it the next day. However, the job was VERY badly done, rushed and probably done in spite. Now I have a misfitting blouse, beyond repair, to wear for a very important occasion.
Lesson: Be very tactful in dealings that involve the need for good service. Treat your aid with respect and understanding and you will have cooperation and good service. Treat them badly and they will do the same.
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Case 4
As elaborately mentioned in my previous blog, this is about the girl who travels to work with me. Despite many reminders, she is consistently late, causing most of us (mostly me) stress in getting to work on time.
Action: I sent her a sms, stating clearly that I am unhappy about it and my (drastic) course of action to deal with her. I stuck to my word from the very next day, when she was late once again.
Response: She got my message loud and clear. She was apologetic and did not engage in an argument to reverse my decision.
Lesson: Consistency is key to dealing with people who fail in certain areas habitually. Giving into their ways or loosening up, only causes more disappointment.
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No two experiences or personalities are alike and each object of conflict must have a customised method of approach. The first most important thing to do is to regain composure before reacting. Second, one must consider all the facts of the situation. Third, one must be reasonable when making a decision. Fourth, the message going across must be short and to the point showing reason and some degree of understanding. Fifth, be consistent and do not waiver in the decision made (provided it was made with the above considerations)...
....in theory, at least!
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