To my parents, with love

There is no better day to talk of the importance of loving our parents.

I came home after a long day of work and study, to a noisy and chaotic house with a child throwing tantrums. I knew with my exhaustion and hunger, I would have attacked the child. So I locked myself up in my room for 20 minutes to breathe before I went over to participate in the family obligations, even then, I didnt talk for the next 30 minutes. But what amazed me was the patience with which his mother tolerated this hungry/sleepy monster, eventhough everyone around was losing their patience while she herself was tired, sick and multi-tasking household chores. This is just a fraction of an example of how much patience and sacrifice our parents would have gone through for years before we were able to stand on our feet.

Although this bond between parents and children is primarily an evolutionary trait to ensure survival of the species, one can't help but feel guilt over not being able to repay the kindness they showed us when we were young, and still continue to do.

Every culture, every religion places filial piety - respect and love for parents - above most.

The Chinese culture alone states the following ideals:

• Being good to one's parents; not being rebellious, showing love, respect & support
• Taking care of one's parents
• Engaging in good conduct outside the home so as to bring a good name to one's parents
• Performing the duties of one's job well so as to obtain the material means to support parents
• Dissuading them from moral unrighteousness
• Carry out certain rites in their name, after their death

It is never easy to listen to their every whim and fancy, specially when they appear stubborn, unreasonable and illogical. But I try.

They are no longer the strong willed, authoritarian and confident individuals I used to remember. Now, they are old, feeble, queer, unpredictable, child-like and with poor memory. And we children of the 21st century, have ventured far out from the grasps of our parents to look for better opportunities and bask in the freedom of making our own choices. Now, I meet them only once or twice per year. They are in our thoughts very often, and we worry alot when they are sick or troubled, but there is not much we can do being so far away. I know they yearn to see day they can live near their children, but that's very unlikely. We have our own lives, own lifestyles, own obligations that we can't give up easily to go and  be with them.  We send them cash to make up not being able to be with them and take care of them personally. And we tell ourselves we are doing our best.

When they are gone, their legacy will be glorified. We will have countless fond memories and things to be thankful for. There will even be some regrets to haunt us for the rest of our lives. And  if ever we have children of our own, we will appreciate our parents even more as we experience the challenges of parenting. Such is the circle of Life.

Incidentally, my grandfather turned 100 today.